I didn’t know it was December . I was sure there would be another week of November . November’s one of the long months , after all . But I heard it on the radio : December First . When I got home I verified it with Ada . December First ? Yeah .
Now I have to put up Christmas lights . Some of the neighbors already have theirs up . I’ll wait for some of the snow to melt first . Well , no snow in Arcadia recently , not for at least a century , I suppose , so that excuse might not fly .
But , many of these Christmas yard -reindeer are white . That means they’re covered with snow , I think . And the inflatable Santas are all bundled up in snow boots and mittens . Some of the roofs ( rooves ?) are snow -covered . Well , the strings of lights look like snowflakes , at least , don’t they ?
It’s all very confusing . Especially since December seems to have suddenly sneaked up on me , popped out of nowhere . I saw a Facebook post about ” the running of the Santas ” . There is a photo of hundreds ( I didn’t actually count them ) of Santas . All of them had the red suits , the black boots , the white beards . I wonder if they are all Elvises during the off-season . What do you think ? And Uncle Sams on July 4th . Is there a circuit ?
I haven’t done my Christmas shopping yet — not that I ever do much , anyway . It may be ‘the thought that counts’ , but it’s pretty hard to gift wrap a thought nicely . Pretty wrapping paper with Christmas tree bulbs . Big red bow .
Wow ! Thanks for the thought !
No . Wouldn’t work .
We have a wooden candy cane in the garage I will need to stick out in the front yard . There used to be an angel banner , too , but , the angel may have flown off by now . Maybe not .
Angels are somewhat unpredictable . My guardian angel , never especially competent( sorry , angel ! ) , in my observation , seems to also have been missing for the last few decades . Gave up , I guess . I wouldn’t blame him/her/it for that , really . I’ve heard that guardian angels don’t volunteer for the job . They’re assigned . Some are lucky , I guess , and get some bright kid with ambition , initiative , and loads of energy . I’m thinking of a Bill Gates type . For all the other g.a. draftees it’s probably a pretty depressing line of work — a type of angeling they hadn’t counted on when they showed up for heavenly roll call .
Lucifer and those boys don’t have to be guardian angels , I suspect . But , as everyone knows , they do sit on shoulders and offer the opposing view when the g. a. is trying his/her/its best to give good advice . That little devil input must be a kick for the devil , but would be extremely frustrating for the struggling guardian angel .
But , enough of angels . I better get over to the mall and have a look around . I hope Black Thursday is over and done with . Never can tell , these days . There might be a Red Sticker Monday or a Price Cut Tuesday or a Buy One Get One Free Wednesday or a Gray Thursday . If there is I’d like to know beforehand so that I can avoid the crowds .
However , I did have an idea about those sale days . Someone could invent and market elbow armor to use to battle one’s way into the store at four in the morning , or whenever . It would strap on securely and could be used defensively or offensively . Whack ! Whack ! Get and keep the advantage as you fight to open a path toward that big flat screen T.V. that’s suddenly so cheap . You’re buying it for a present , right ? Yeah , right .
Don’t worry about your guardian angel as you strap on your elbow armor . He/she/ it has been in a coma since you were a kid , probably , and he /she/it no doubt wouldn’t be much of a help anyway .
On the other hand , if you still have a functioning g.a. , and you want to give away that flat screen , I could make room in the house for it . I’d probably mount it on the wall in the small den and watch it from next door . We’d work it out . Think it over .
Welcome to December .