How My Pet Monkey Ruined New Years

2015 will be a good year.

Army Of Awesome People

As the new year approaches, I cannot help but think of a fateful New Year’s Eve past, spent by the fireplace with my pet monkey, Chip Dip.  For the longest time, we just sat quietly in our respective arm chairs, he in his smoking jacket and I in my robe, privately reflecting on the past, present and future, the fire crackling all the while.

“Tell me Chip Dip,” I said, finally breaking the silence, “do you have any goals for the new year?”

The monkey turned his head, glancing at me before returning his gaze to the dancing flames as he seemingly soaked in my question. Another moment passed before Chip Dip finally got up, strolled over to the fireplace and closed the flue.

“CHIP DIP!!!!!!!!!!!”  I shouted, “YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO KEEP THAT OPEN!!!”

I chased Chip Dip around the living room for 45 minutes until it finally filled with smoke and I passed out.

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Filed under humor

2 responses to “How My Pet Monkey Ruined New Years

  1. I’m sticking with dogs and cats

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