Ah ! Socks ( and rugged individualism )

Socks . It’s not one of the Republican campaign issues as far as I know . Not a Democrat issue either . Not even Bernie Sanders mentions socks . What , then , socks don’t matter ?

I have one pair of socks that I bought in 1982 . It’s thick grey wool , warm , comfortable . I bought three similar pairs back then and I paid seven bucks for them .

Over the years the washing machine hid one or two or more of the socks , and a few more wore out . Old age . I am left with one surviving pair .

The damned things are older than many of the people I know . But don’t tell anybody that . I think it might make them feel uncomfortable . Hell of a thing , I would think , to hang out with some guy who has socks older than you are .

Like my old friend ( my age ) Ivan said about twenty years ago about the two of us : ” They look at us like we’re old grey monkeys . ”  Who knows what part of what conversation that was part of . I remember the expression, though ,  because I became aware at that moment in time that we old grey monkeys don’t feel like old grey monkeys most of the time . That’s the joke life likes to play on old grey monkeys  . Very funny .

But , let’s talk about socks . I was reading my friend Dan’s blog post about socks , and again I was inspired by his thoughts, this time  on the topic of  socks .Poland marathon run 014

I’d like to hear , maybe , Donald Trump expound upon the subject of socks . Good , warm , comfortable socks ! Does What’s-his-name Cruz have at least a few pair of good warm wool socks ?  What’s his oldest pair of socks ?  How about that young other Cuban guy’s socks situation ? Mario ? No , Marco . Well , I don’t think he is even in the socks competition . But I bet Rand Paul has a few old pairs of warm socks tucked away somewhere .

And on the Democratic side ? Bernie Sanders may or may not have a few pair of thick woolies packed back in a closet or a drawer ready for a cold spell . He’s from Vermont , after all , isn’t he ? But Mrs. Clinton ?  I doubt it . I could be wrong , though . But I doubt it .

And how about all those other wanna-bees , you may ask ? Who knows ? I doubt very seriously whether any of the ones I’ve heard of have the gravitas to recognize the importance of a good pair of socks . Well , if you pointed it out to them they’d expound upon it , no doubt , at length and surely with pretend passion . But , I’d ask , why haven’t  they talked about the subject yet ? It’s not important to them ?

I ask you people : Do we want someone who talks only to the cliche topics , who addresses only the bandied-about issues so relentlessly propped up by corporate media outlets and corporate lobbyists and fear-mongering gurus and biased billionaires ?  Shall we be slaves to the numbing blare of mindless dumbed-down public chatter ? Or shall we have , rather , representatives who are not afraid to discuss real topics that thinking people  care about , such as the high price of a good pair of wool socks ?

Maybe it’s just me . After all , I realize that there’s not much to fear from socks , one way or another , I suppose . Socks won’t , then , become a real topic of political discussion . I guess I should just hold my tongue about the socks issue , which , by the way , I have not yet begun to even scratch the surface of ( or,  of which my literary friend Joe would suggest I say , more properly , something like:  ‘of which to scratch the surface …..’ )

I was reading about the issue of corn ethanol in Iowa . It’s not a big issue in Iowa these days , I read in the newspaper . Cruz hates the idea of mandating more ethanol in automobile fuel . Iowans don’t really give a tinker’s damn about it , either , any more , according to the report . Environmentalists , I guess , don’t much like ethanol in the gas  either, anymore  . I guess I’m confused about the whole thing . Hard to figure out what the Koch brothers , who own most of America , think about it  , too . Don’t they own most of the the corn fields these days ? Or was that Ford Motor Corp . ?

But , of course , the Koch brothers  don’t like any regulation . They are good ol’ American rugged individualists , I suspect , who don’t own , probably , even one frayed pair of old socks between them . That makes me wonder , and worry,  about the future of America . Socks, I think ,  are the foundation of the whole thing , yeah ?

Author’s note : ( Instead of ‘whole thing’ in the last sentence , I almost said “whole shootin’ match “. But that’s a whole other subject best left for another time  )socks







Filed under humor

6 responses to “Ah ! Socks ( and rugged individualism )

  1. Thanks for the shout and for a most entertaining look at socks. I think, during the next debate, they should zoom in on the socks the candidates are wearing. I think you’re right, they tell the story. I think I might like a President who has a pair of socks that he/she has nearly worn out.

  2. You make a very good point, Dan. It’s gonna be hard to eat all that candy out of the sock next year I can tell you that!! 🙄

  3. Dan Hen,

    Please thank Ivan for his grey monkey metaphor; then ask him to mail me a membership card and grey monkey badge.


    A. Monkey

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