best intentions

Back in a previous century I used to volunteer at a summer camp up in the San Bernardino Mountains . In the fall , after the camping season , some of us gathered to clean up the camp and to prepare it for winter .

I found myself cleaning up an attic in the cafeteria building. There was a large carton full of rolls of toilet paper . The corner of the cardboard carton had been chewed-through by rodents . Some of the rolls of toilet paper were yellow with rodent pee .

The camp director told me to throw the whole thing out . I didn’t. I threw out all of the peed-on rolls and I threw out all of the surrounding rolls , and I threw out a buffer zone more of rolls and then , to be overly safe , I threw out another layer of rolls . And then I asked the director if I could keep the remaining rolls of toilet paper . He okayed the idea.

Well , here’s my story for today . I was teaching in a small elementary school in Venice . The principal had a faculty party at her house . I got one of those fancy bags to hold bottles of wine . You know ’em . But I put in there three rolls of toilet instead of wine . Good joke , eh ?

The principal met me at the door that evening. She was so happy to see what she thought was wine . But it wasn’t wine , of course . When she took it from me she misjudged its weight and she nearly threw it over her shoulder . Surprised , she looked inside and saw the toilet paper .

Well , perhaps I should have thought that one out a bit more carefully before loading the wine bag with toilet paper . I’m pretty sure she read several interpretations into the situation that appeared obvious to me a bit later but that had not been intended . She shot me an evil eye that could have melted an iceberg . Opps ! , I thought . Ah , sometimes with the best intentions……………

“When things go wrong or don’t turn out the way you pictured them in your head , you just have to go with the good intention defense . I have a lot of good intentions .” ——–Blake Sheldon


Filed under humor

4 responses to “best intentions

  1. Maybe if she understood how much trouble you went to to avoid giving her rodent pee.

    • Ha! I hadn’t thought of that. Actually , I liked her and she probably liked me until that one moment at the door . By the way , I had t-paper for years —- couldn’t give it away !

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